By Charles “Al” Huth
There are a multitude of distractions that could be encountered when attempting to reach one’s full potential and enjoy a harmonic life in adulthood.
- Abandonment issues create conditions that limit one’s ability to totally love another. Children who suffered the loss of a parent or loved one are often psychologically traumatized. This fear is so embedded in their mindset that they have difficulties trusting another. Below their conscious awareness is the fear of losing another loved one. This prevents them from getting too attached to another. Fear of loss will damage a committed relationship. This person will instinctively push away or sabotage relationships and will not allow a complete loving bond with another. At some level, their partner will feel this disconnect and question the viability of the relationship.
- Family expectations can affect anyone’s ability to be their true selves. A son with the heart of an artist, who becomes an engineer to please his father, may never achieve total happiness or a complete sense of fulfillment. Following one’s deepest passions is necessary for a life of comfortable satisfaction. Living someone else’s dreams also can negatively affects one’s family and friends.
- Religious beliefs that separate us from each other also interfere with our ability to bond, love and accept each other. “My religion is the correct one and yours is not” is an issue that creates separation. Beliefs that conflict with science are invalid. The pull of gravity is not contingent on what you believe. The Principle of Oneness cannot be altered by one’s beliefs. We are social beings with an intimate and energetic relationship with All There Is. Love is an interactive and connective energy that enables us to thrive.
- The physically challenged are not normally viewed as capable of living a full life. These people strive for acceptance and respect just like the rest of us, and want to contribute their gifts. They have aspirations and needs just like everyone else. Living with these kinds of frustrations can be debilitating. They are an important part of our community. Therefore, we are morally obligated to see them and treat them as such. As members of human society, everyone needs to be included in terms of benefits and obligations to each other. It enhances life for everyone.
- An intellectually challenged adult has difficulties socializing and finding acceptance. Finding a comfortable environment where one fits in is very difficult. They must rely on family or others who will care for them. Those who provide this service deserve the highest level of our respect. They can be a role model for all of us. Consider the possibility that a mentally impaired person has a positive impact on society. They help us keep a focus on our humanity. It can be inspirational to watch a severely challenged person strive to be all they can be. They can be a source of gratitude for the gifts that each of us share.
- Gender inequality is a prejudice that hinders the quality of life for everyone. When we ignore the gifts that others have to offer, we limit the quality of life for everyone. Both genders, by their very nature, have unique qualities to share that will enhance everyone’s life. Only when society actively endorses everyone’s intelligence and talents will humankind reach full potential.
- Sexual preferences are often treated with prejudice. Some choose to “stay in the closet,” so to speak, while others are willing to show up. For those who live in hiding, they fear being found out. Under these conditions, living as your True Self is not possible. The reward for expressing your True Self, for being comfortable with it, can far exceed its fears.
- Sexual abuse, both physical and mental, can have lifelong lasting effects. One must learn how live with the memory in a productive way, or it can be debilitating. There may not be a way to completely erase the pain; however, it is possible to find something in that experience that adds value to your life. Some things are not easy but worth doing to attain personal peace and healing.
- Skin color prejudice feels and looks like a human condition that places value on light-colored versus darker skin. It is a challenge for some humans to look past what someone looks like to see what’s within – our true essence. This prejudice is generally set during our childhood, and should always be re-evaluated in adulthood with the light of maturity and intelligence. Do you think that anyone wants to be valued solely on their skin’s appearance? I think not. Would you?
- An overprotective, “helicopter” parent can have a detrimental effect on their child’s ability to develop into a productive and happy adult. A necessary part of childhood includes developing skills, knowledge and attitudes that are fundamentally important in adulthood. A mother who has a young child, with a large gap in years after her other children, may experience a desire to keep this child as a baby as long as possible. This overprotection prevents the child from developing important lifelong skills. The inability to be responsible for one’s own actions, handling money, or live an independent life are some examples of disempowering a child.
- The need to be like someone else, or have what they have, limits one’s full potential. This diversion from one’s True Self restricts one’s ability to be all they can be. A feeling of satisfaction is greatly enhanced when you live as your True Self.
When we observe the behavior of another, that observation only reveals what we can see. The non-observable dynamics that drives the behavior of others is not necessarily revealed to us. One should not assume that the behavior of another is irrational. While growing up, if someone told you how much they loved you while beating you on the head, the word ‘love’ would bring up a negative connotation for you. Without this background information, your behavior would not be fully understood by others. Therefore, negative judgments of others are risky in terms of creating understanding and harmonious relationships. We live in a society where everyone needs to be included. As a legitimate member of society, we are obligated to help others because it is at the core of our true nature.
I have experienced many difficulties and tragedies in my life. However, I am constantly reminded that there are many others who have had more severe difficulties to overcome than I. I sometimes wonder if I could have done as well as they have – and I don’t believe I could.
Understanding the truth can help heal your life. It is difficult to repair something if the problem is not fully understood. Instead of negatively judging others, focus on who you are. Are your beliefs are in alignment with your actual thoughts and actions? We can learn something of value from everyone. The contributions of others can add texture and color to enhance our own lives.
The truth has its own power!